Ambition
It takes drive to some something worth while.
I don't do this automatically, because there was a moment (probably college, when I realized I was paying thousands of dollars to play videogames) where I realized that I need to work towards something. I can't remember exactly what I was doing which spurred this, wait...no, I do. It was failing an exam in my intro to computer science class.
Com Sci, the wave of the future, which I wanted to embark on.
I realized I wasn't good at this. I began to scramble for what my life will look like. I feel like this was a moment that freshmen go through, and then chose their classes accordingly. I did it in the end of my 3rd year of Rutgers University (my realization usually come late.)
Crying in a dean's office, which isn't an uncommon occurrence, but I never enjoyed making people awkward. Nobody wants to wake up and say "man, I hope a young adult figures out they're dicking around with their life, and it's costing years of their future paychecks." It's the only scenario in my life that I couldn't finagle, it's something my parents could not bail me out (Ha! They totally did.)
Anyway, my life lines up in a row, and I now have to make the real attempt of plucking around the non-realistic aspects and start the journey have starting an income. When they hand that rifle to start shooting away the bad, they kinda tell which ones you should aim at, but they aren't really committed to the guidance that they give you. You aim for that first duck, they pat you on the back and wish you good luck. They don't stick around when you blow away a Communications Major. They don't advise you when the Anthropology Major is in your scope. They don't scream and point to the Theater Major that you look at, shrug, and find a different duck.
It was the most credits I had at the time, so I figured it was the best chance I had.
This was a time where the assumption was still "Oh, I get the degree ,and then somebody, somewhere, gives me a job. Stay with company, make money, go to new company. Got it." I still don't know where I came up with this mentality, but it was there. My new goal in life was get through the Model Set and Theater Business classes as fast as I can, finish in four years, and hop on the train to Corporate America.
Instead, I decided to become a writer and work at Pizza Hut.
A little tidbit about me- I was the kid in school that misspelled everything, couldn't say anything correctly, at the work ethic of a ADHD pot smoker. What I had decided is to pick up a career in which I ignored every skill that was considered essentially to the professional. Could you imagine that? I guess the closest think I could think of is an immigrant to master a professional sport that he's never played, with no talent or coordination.
This is when I learned what drive came from. It wasn't on the many sports teams which I my dad coached with the tome or the minimal knowledge, or the homework that my mother helped me on. This is a decision that I made on my own, but had to follow though. Work on it my own, sell my skills on my own, and show people that I wasn't inadequate...by my own.
Think about that last part. There's no certification or degree you can take (and be taken seriously) that shows how good of a writer you are. If they don't know your name already, or the books that you've written (that's been adapted into a film) you have to get them read a minimum of 300 pages before they can be like whoa, you're the real deal.
That's when I stared to realize how much drive I'd need. I have to convince I'm not shit, in the smallest amount of words possible. That's when I learned drive was important.
That's when I started working on my drive.
I don't do this automatically, because there was a moment (probably college, when I realized I was paying thousands of dollars to play videogames) where I realized that I need to work towards something. I can't remember exactly what I was doing which spurred this, wait...no, I do. It was failing an exam in my intro to computer science class.
Com Sci, the wave of the future, which I wanted to embark on.
I realized I wasn't good at this. I began to scramble for what my life will look like. I feel like this was a moment that freshmen go through, and then chose their classes accordingly. I did it in the end of my 3rd year of Rutgers University (my realization usually come late.)
Crying in a dean's office, which isn't an uncommon occurrence, but I never enjoyed making people awkward. Nobody wants to wake up and say "man, I hope a young adult figures out they're dicking around with their life, and it's costing years of their future paychecks." It's the only scenario in my life that I couldn't finagle, it's something my parents could not bail me out (Ha! They totally did.)
Anyway, my life lines up in a row, and I now have to make the real attempt of plucking around the non-realistic aspects and start the journey have starting an income. When they hand that rifle to start shooting away the bad, they kinda tell which ones you should aim at, but they aren't really committed to the guidance that they give you. You aim for that first duck, they pat you on the back and wish you good luck. They don't stick around when you blow away a Communications Major. They don't advise you when the Anthropology Major is in your scope. They don't scream and point to the Theater Major that you look at, shrug, and find a different duck.
It was the most credits I had at the time, so I figured it was the best chance I had.
This was a time where the assumption was still "Oh, I get the degree ,and then somebody, somewhere, gives me a job. Stay with company, make money, go to new company. Got it." I still don't know where I came up with this mentality, but it was there. My new goal in life was get through the Model Set and Theater Business classes as fast as I can, finish in four years, and hop on the train to Corporate America.
Instead, I decided to become a writer and work at Pizza Hut.
A little tidbit about me- I was the kid in school that misspelled everything, couldn't say anything correctly, at the work ethic of a ADHD pot smoker. What I had decided is to pick up a career in which I ignored every skill that was considered essentially to the professional. Could you imagine that? I guess the closest think I could think of is an immigrant to master a professional sport that he's never played, with no talent or coordination.
This is when I learned what drive came from. It wasn't on the many sports teams which I my dad coached with the tome or the minimal knowledge, or the homework that my mother helped me on. This is a decision that I made on my own, but had to follow though. Work on it my own, sell my skills on my own, and show people that I wasn't inadequate...by my own.
Think about that last part. There's no certification or degree you can take (and be taken seriously) that shows how good of a writer you are. If they don't know your name already, or the books that you've written (that's been adapted into a film) you have to get them read a minimum of 300 pages before they can be like whoa, you're the real deal.
That's when I stared to realize how much drive I'd need. I have to convince I'm not shit, in the smallest amount of words possible. That's when I learned drive was important.
That's when I started working on my drive.
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